Monday, 23 October 2017

Why I Don't Write



Why I don’t write:

Poems are not poems anymore. They’re broken lines one after the other and brokenness scares me. It takes me a long time to sew my lines one into the other and I don’t think I can handle breaking them again

Everyone writes. The same things. They write so much better than I do. They know what I want to talk about. My words come from the pit of my stomach. I can’t have anything new to say

The world is weird. My stories comfort me because they’re mundane and comfortable and snuggly. No one wants to read mundane today. I don’t have cold to offer and I don’t know if anyone will accept my comforter

I don’t want to see you reading what I wrote because you frown when you focus on words and I bite my lip without even realizing thinking that my feelings don’t make sense to you. You smile when you discover that I actually don’t write, don’t imagine, don’t make up things, I just watch around all day and twist the words so no one would know that I’m writing about them


I don’t write because what if someone actually reads it and then looks at me with those knowing eyes and in that moment I realize I have nothing more to offer, they know who I am

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